A lot has happened since I got back.
I've officially given up on caring about having friends or looking like a loser. I mean why does it even matter? I walk in the halls by myself everywhere and stand by myself in the halls... I guess it would be fun to have a friend once in a while but its kinda nice not having to hear people talk about themselves all the time.
Yesterday was prom, and of course I didnt go because I dont have a date... and of course my friend went with the boy I like...
So, thats just another thing I'm going to have to let go. I've come to realize that life isnt always about getting what you want, its about waiting your turn and putting others before yourself.
Yes, I could have been upset, hurt, mad whatever. But if thats what my friend wanted to do, I'm going to let her do it. She feels as though its in her best interest. Sometimes life is about just letting things go and not making a big deal about everything, because in the scheme of things it doesnt really matter.
My grandma also died this week. It kinda shows me that while people are out there thinking prom is the biggest thing ever, there are bigger things. It was really hard, she was a hero in my life. It got me thinking about life and death and god. You really can't take anything for granted.
So, I've learned that sometimes people just do what they can. You have to realize that life is not about prom or being with the boy you like. Its about being there for your family, because you never know what could happen. Let go of the things that dont matter and cling on to the things that do.
